Well, hello there folks!
Happy Monday!
Happy July 8th!
Happy post 270!
I hope everyone had an enjoyable 4th of July and got some down time to celebrate in whatever fashion speaks to their souls!
I promise to not keep you too long this week.
They say that things come in waves.
And this week, I feel like the waves crashed in on my island and took me right out to sea with them.
BLAH.
GAH.
SAH.
It all started on Monday night with dance rehearsal at the theater. Cabaret (which is a show you should ALL come see) opens in just about 3 weeks and dance rehearsal is in high gear. I felt incredibly rusty since I haven’t done a musical since Something Rotten in October of 2021 and I wasn’t picking up everything as quickly as I thought I would.
So, I got upset and mad at myself.
And the negative talk wave CRASHED and engulfed me.
I went home feeling defeated and stressed.
The next morning, my negative energy was still flowing and the stress at both the full time and part-time job were also in high gear.
CRASH went the wave of negative talk once again.
And I let it engulf me and get the best of me.
And because I can’t hide it well, everyone around me knew.
Everything in life was feeling unaligned and unhinged.
We are our own worst enemy.
And while I’ve become a lot better at responding emotionally to things than I did in the past, there are still moments and a learning curve for me to do better.
I had to give myself a kick in the butt.
A come to Jesus moment of realizing that I needed to get all the shit and negative thoughts and energy out of my life.
Wednesday morning’s gym session was just that.
A therapy session so to speak. (Honestly, my gym workouts are like therapy).
I worked SO hard during leg day and crushed those waves of negative talk right back out to sea.
But, this time, unlike earlier in the week, I didn’t let them take me with.
I got to do my weekly call with Ryan on Wednesday night and it was another moment of being able to verbalize and word vomit negative thoughts and self-talk to get back on the path to being aligned in the Mr. Sunshine path of portals.
This week, instead of getting frustrated with myself at rehearsal, I’m going to practice even harder in my apartment.
This week, when I feel stressed at work, I’m going to remember to get up, walk away from my desk and take some deep breaths.
This week, I’m going to remind myself that I’m my own worst enemy and that I WILL NOT let the waves engulf me.
This week, I’m going to remind myself that I am a human who is…
BEAUTIFUL.
KIND.
LOVING.
HARD-WORKING.
TRUSTWORTHY.
LOYAL.
WORTHY.
This week, I hope you will do the same.
Sprinkle sunshine always,
JP!
Mr. Sunshine Smiles 