Afraid. Fear.

Hi folks and happy Monday!

And even though it officially kicked off on June 1st, happy belated Pride Month too!

I am currently outside in the backyard of Sunshine Cottage enjoying a beautiful Summer night under the lights with a wine, Dr. Pepper, and my feet propped on an adirondack chair.

It is in these moments where life just feels perfect.

If only.

It seems with each passing minute, hour, day, week, and month that everything is far from perfect…

…Especially the world.

A few weeks ago, we were delivered news about a mass shooting at an elementary school in Texas.

And that night, the day it happened, I sat on my couch and shed tears.

I shed tears for the innocent lives lost, the families that were affected, and our world.

Gun violence is not something new to our society; however, it certainly seems to have gotten more out of control recently.

For some reason, I can remember back to the time when breaking news came across the TV screen about the Columbine school shooting that happened back in 1999.

And here we are 23 years later, still being delivered news about mass shootings and learning how to navigate the aftermath of the horror.

Far from perfect.

I think what scares me the most is that these types of incidents can happen anywhere and at any time.

And they cause a constant fear to be in the back of my head, which makes me sad.

I know that we are not supposed to live in fear, but gosh darn it, I certainly don’t know how to do it.

Just this past weekend, I got to enjoy a weekend off from both work and church duties and took a trip to Philly with my bestie Devin and his partner Jed to visit our friend Krishna before he moved to Chicago.

It was a quick trip filled with delicious food, rainbows, adult cocktails, lots of laughs, and many memories…

…including me trying to get into the wrong room at the wrong hotel…

Yes, you did read that right.

But I will save that story if you wish to hear it for and in-person discussion because it’s better that way.

A retelling of it is almost and most certainly better with Mr. Sunshine energy, faces, and hand motions than reading it in a text format.

It will def be a part of my comedy routine when I become a stand up comic in my next life and take the material on tour.

Anyhoo, I digress.

Sunday morning, after our fun night out in Philly, I woke up to several texts including from my best friend, Marissa making sure I was okay.

The text said…”Just read about the shooting in Philly…you ok??”

I wasn’t 100% sure what she was referring to, but then saw the headline of the news article our friend Krishna had also sent to Jed, Devin, and I in a group message:

“14 People Shot, 3 Dead, In Mass Shooting On South Street.”

Literally just a few minutes away from where we were partying and having fun dancing the night away hours before.

It could’ve happened to us…

And that scares the living hell out of me.

On the way home, I was so quiet in the car because I literally just kept replaying the fact that it could’ve been us.

And I would be lying to you if I said I wasn’t a little bit scared for the fact that I’m headed to Wildwood beaches next week for a huge Country music festival and all that I can think of is violence and gunfire happening.

I am afraid.

Hug the people in your life just a little bit tighter next time.

Say I love you every chance you get.

And fight for positive change in our world.

Sprinkle sunshine always,