I’m going to be blunt for a moment and not be very Mr. Sunshine like, so I apologize in advance. And while this blog post may not have the same kind of feel and energy like the others, there are emotions of anger and sadness that I must express.
It has been a week from hell. There have been tragedies not only on a national level, but also both a state and local level. Tie this all in with the added stress I’ve been feeling in regards to my dad and his health you have the formula for a pretty draining week both emotionally and physically. And while I try not to make it evident in my daily life, it is weeks like this that cause even the most optimistic Mr. Sunshine to stumble with trying to stay positive. It is weeks like this that cause the flame of light in my soul to dim.
Last week, I was writing at this time about my dad and his sudden admittance to the hospital for extreme weakness and sickness. This week, while our family knows a bit more to the condition that he was battling, there is still unknown fear ahead. It’s like the light at the end of the tunnel isn’t quite visible for him yet. I can’t begin to thank all the people who reached out with prayers, good thoughts, and vibes during this very trying time. For those who don’t know, my dad has been experiencing a lot of pain and discomfort. He was scheduled to have surgery on Friday of last week, but the Doctors cancelled at the last minute because was a bit under the weather and not quite 100%. On Sunday, after running my half marathon, I stopped by my parents’ house to say hello and he looked very lethargic and weak–and quite pale. He definitely didn’t seem like himself. He was taken to the ER where he ended up being admitted to the hospital for a few days. We later found out that he not only had a extremely high white blood cell count, but also had contracted sepsis, which is a life-threatening complication of an infection in the bloodstream. And while my dad is on the mend to hopefully becoming 100% again and prepare for surgery in the coming weeks, it scares the hell out of me. Seriously. The hell out of me. In the coming weeks, I would definitely appreciate continued good thoughts, prayers, and vibes for my dad. I honestly can’t thank you enough or tell you how much it means to me and my family. The support has been priceless and has made our hearts incredibly full–we can’t thank you enough.
On Friday afternoon, I learned from some of my friends about a horrific car accident that took place right outside my former Alma Mater, Warwick High School. A 63 year-old woman driving recklessly crashed into a total of 8 cars, causing multiple injuries, and sending several high school students to the hospital. One of those students died during surgery on Friday and earlier today (Sunday morning), a second of those students passed away. Two completely innocent lives. Gone. I can’t imagine the pain that the families of these students are going through currently and I pray that they will be able to find comfort and healing in those around them for the support that they need to get through such a difficult time. It’s amazing how affected you can feel by these tragedies even when you are not directly related to the victims. Warwick High School was a home to me during the years of 2002-2006 and almost 12 years later, I feel even more connected as an alumni in the face of a terrible tragedy that claimed the lives of people that were way too young.
And as if these events weren’t enough, I opened CNN.com on Saturday to be blasted with the headline about a deadly shooting at a synagogue in Pittsburgh. Another 11 innocent lives. Gone. Why is it that in today’s world, it is impossible for us to open a newspaper or website without a headline that involves some type of negativity, death, shooting, bullying, or tragedy? Why has that become the norm?
I’m not going to lie…it is really hard for me…the eternal optimist to keep pushing forward during weeks like this. It’s hard for me to see the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s hard for me to not feel knocked down and stuck under the world’s foot of negativity that suffocates me from staying positive and sharing the optimism and joys of life.
Tonight, as I wrote this post, I found myself listening to the following song on repeat. It is exactly how I seem to be feeling amongst all the shit that has happened in the past week, but offers the optimism and hope that we will be found in the moments of total darkness–whether it be by a complete stranger or someone whom we love and care for very much.
I encourage you all to take a few minutes to close your eyes, listen to the song, and really let it sink in.
Even when the dark comes crashing through, when you need someone to carry you, when you’re broken on the ground, YOU WILL BE FOUND.
It’s been a week from hell.
But amongst the hate, negativity, and tragedies you and I will be found. We will all be found.
And as the world tries to dim the flame inside our souls, we must lean on each other, support each other, and fight to find ways to keep the aspects of LOVE, KINDNESS and COMPASSION alive.
Each one of us must do our part to keep the sun streaming in on a broken world of darkness.
Sprinkle sunshine always,
JP!
So sorry that you’ve had such a rotten week but it’s ok to feel down about it, to worry or feel sad. Saying that these feelings will pass – soon I hope! Best wishes for you and your Dad x
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