Mr. Sunshine Smiles

Back on September 19, 2014 when a friend of mine named Kaitlin Boland posted a comment on my Facebookwall about considering running The Hope Express. I remember thinking that it was the craziest idea that I had ever heard of in my 27 years of existence. But, it got me thinking. And that night I went home and the wheels in my head began to turn as I thought about the idea more and more. And the more I thought, the more I realized that this would be one heck of an awesome way to involve myself in the great student-run philanthropy in the world that had become so close to my heart during my four years of involvement at Penn State. So, two days later, on September 21, I submitted my initial application.

I remember for the next week I was constantly checking my email more than five times a day to see about whether or not I was considered to be a “Hopeful.” The day I got the email telling me I was an official “Hopeful,” I remember having an excited burst of energy, but also that slight nervousness of “What the heck did I get myself into?” The next months were a complete whirlwind—having the initial fundraising conference call with Carolyn learning about the ins and outs of raising funds, planning fundraisers and working on an execution plan, writing letters and emails to potential donors, setting goals for myself, and scheduling the highly anticipated phone interview with Autumn.

The night of my interview is still as clear as day in my head. I remember my palms being incredibly sweaty and when Autumn answered the phone her first question was something along the lines of “What would you do if I said I was the meanest person in the world?” I was a bit taken aback by the question, but remember answering withsomething like “I wouldn’t believe it.” Autumn made me feel very at home and I had no problem having conversation with her and sharing my true passions and feelings about the questions that she asked—and she made me think—very hard and deep down into my heart’s truest emotions and feelings. 

The next week or two were filled with the final push for people to get their donations in for the initial fundraising period. (And I must admit that Carolyn was not kidding when she said that you get incredibly happy every time you receive a donation. I for one was always doing a little dance in my room every time I got an email from Carolyn about online donations or check in the mail!) I remember waking up Thanksgiving morning and being so anxious to either receive the call or email about whether or not I had been selected to be a part of the 2015 Hope Express. I kept loading my email on my IPhone as I watched the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and frowning each timewhen it told me there wasn’t a new message. 

And then, it was there! I took a deep breath and I remember reading through Hank’s email thinking that it was worded telling me I was not chosen and my heart sank, but he was a trickster! Toward the end paragraph he wrote that the list of runners was attached. I took a deep breath and opened the attachment…and I cried. My mom was right there with me and I gave her the biggest hug in the world out of complete joy that I was being given the honor to be a part of something so incredible. The next week was full of runs around my town in beautiful weather and just enjoying the scenery around me and taking every moment in. I remember receiving another email from Hank a week later on December 2 that told us who had been chosen to be a “Mountain Runner” and I saw my name listed. Hank told us in the email that there was no greater honor than being selected for a mountain, so I again I had feelings of super excitement, but also the “What the heck did I get myself into?!” thoughts as well. I remember picking out some hills in my head that I thought would be good training spots for me to practice. 

I ran my first hill on Christmas morning—and it was a killer. I remember gasping for breath and my legs feeling like jello by the time I got to the top. The words of “I can’t do this” kept bouncing around in my head, but then I would think about who I was doing it for and the immediate jello feeling in my legs disappeared and my motivation and energy suddenly powered back into my system. It was an incredible feeling. 

Leading up to runner’s weekend, I remember going on Facebook and seeing all the “runfies” that my fellow teammates were taking on their training runs and I would just smile. I remember getting more and more excited with each inspiration email that came from Hank. I remember going through all the emotions possible every time I read each heart-felt story. 

On January 12, 2015, I received word that a very good friend of mine who I had done shows with at a local theatre had lost her battle with cancer. Her name was Wendy and she always was full of life and always had a smile on her face no matter how crappy she felt. It was my first day at a new job and I remember not being able to cry because I didn’t want to be perceived as a wimp who couldn’t handle the job. And as soon as I clocked out and got in the car, I cried. In fact, I bawled. I got home and walked into my roommate and hugged her for 5 minutes without moving or speaking and just cried. I went to my room and cried for the next hour and a half. I was so mad. I was mad at cancer. I was mad at life being unfair. I was mad that God couldn’t have done something to me. I struggled a lot the next few days and found it very hard to not cry uncontrollably at any given moment. The death of Wendy helped me realize and get even more motivation for doing The Hope Express. It helped me put a lot into perspective about my life and what I take for granted and realize that cancer doesn’t discriminate and that it doesn’t care about who it attacks. 

Runner’s Weekend was an awesome experience and I loved every second of getting to know the teammates that I would be sharing this incredible journey with and hearing about their stories. The next four weeks leading up to the actual run were filled with many emotional runs full of tears and anger. There were mornings where I didn’t want to get out of bed because it was so cold, but in the back of my head I kept remembering why I was doing it. And I kept seeing Wendy’ face. 

The week of the run, I remember becoming incredibly nervous and getting butterflies in my stomach. But the minute I would remember about who I was doing this run for, the butterflies would go away—I even made a special collage of people that I decided to honor during my run—Lexi, Ellen, Carlene, Sally, Kristin, and Wendy. I can’t tell you how many people asked me the week of the run about how they expected us to run in the weather because they were expecting extremely cold temperatures—historic numbers in fact. And I remember telling every single person that the pain and cold we would experience would be nothing compared to what these kids and families go through with this disease. 

The day of the run, I couldn’t wait to see everyone again and I remember jumping around in my seat as I drove to the Angus home. Being reunited with my Team Hope was incredible and the absolute best thing. I couldn’t wait to spend 24 hours with these people. My first leg (which occurred around 12:40am) was brutally cold—the wind chill was around -25 degrees and the snow drifts on the country road I was running were intense, but I crushed it. The constant thought of these kids and the collage of my personal friends and family I was running for kept me going. I remember at one point during the run seeing lights up ahead and thinking “Yes! It’s the RV! I’m almost done!” However, it was a horse trailer parked in a lot, so a false alarm and I remember my heart sank because it felt like three miles had already passed by. 

But I kept running…faster and harder. My second leg wasn’t as cold, but still bitter. It was during sunrise and the scenery around me was gorgeous and I remember taking in everything around me and being in awe about what all of us were doing. The passion and commitment we all shared in common was just overwhelming. I remember taking a nap during my second leg because my third leg was the mountain leg (known as Tussey)—the one that Hank kept telling me throughout the training period that I had no idea what I was getting into. 

While I was still in the trailing car waiting for Meghan to get the handoff from Ami, I remember Wendy giving me a hug and telling me, “Crush that mountain!” Those words stuck with me in my head until the end. I remember arriving at the Whipple Dam Store where I was to receive the handoff and seeing my parents there—and it was pure joy. I ran out to them and gave them a huge hug! It was the perfect motivation for me before beginning my toughest trek yet. I remember getting the handoff from Meghan Duffy and hugging her three times—she was crying because she was just so emotional that she had completed her last leg.

I started down the mountain with the backpack of letters on me and my photo collage around my neck. It seemed normal. And then I began to hurt. And the pain set in. And the wind was blowing. And it was cold. And I began to feel weak. And I began to cry. And I began to start walking. I remember Ryan and Lynn who were in the trailing car behind me shouting out motivating comments to keep me going, but it was so hard. I would begin running again for a few seconds and then I would walk again. I asked for some water and remember taking sips here and there. I continued on and remember walking and then hearing those shouts of “Keep going, one foot in front of the other!” Cars were coming down on the other side of the road and complete strangers were honking in admiration and encouragement. Moralers were passing by and shouting out the window. 

Halfway up the mountain, I saw my parents on the side of the road cheering me on and I began to cry again. It was all becoming real to me. I pushed on. And I remember mumbling “F*** you cancer” under my breath in my ninja mask and began saying the names of the people on my photo collage—Lexi, Sally, Carlene, Wendy, Kristin, and Ellen. It was so painful. I felt like I just needed to give up and let cancer win, but I didn’t. I wasn’t about to let cancer win and take over the HOPE that all of us were trying to spread. I remember seeing Stephanie at the handoff and greeting her with the biggest hug ever and crying. I hugged my mom and dad and cried. And Ryan from the trailing car came out and hugged me. It was all so surreal. The emotions were raw. 

To say that the whole experience was the greatest thing that I’ve ever participated in would be an understatement. The Hope Express was the hardest and most rewarding experience of my life. The friendships I’ve made with the people who share such passion and drive for this cause are priceless. The people behind the scenes who make this come together every year are invaluable. I’m proud to say that HOPE lives on in each and every one of us and we will continue to fight until HOPE lives on in every single person of the world.

It’s currently 11:43pm, which means it is the peak time for Mr. Sunshine blog writing. 

Are you ready? 

Let’s take a moment to be honest with ourselves. 

At some point in our lives, we’ve all dreamed of our lives being a romantic comedy.

I mean…who doesn’t want Zac Efron, Ryan Reynolds, or Bradley Cooper to suddenly step in your life and sweep you off your feet with the highest degree of swooning possible?! 

Count me in. 

Sadly, as much as society pushes for us to believe by sticking it in our faces that life is its own romantic comedy or “like a box of chocolates”…it’s not. 

Well…not for me at least.

And this week we get to experience all the sweetness of little chocolate hearts, scents of fragrant roses, the cuteness of stuffed animals, sappy social media posts, and luxurious five star dinners as the world celebrates the Hallmark holiday acclaimed to be the day of love…more commonly known as Valentine’s Day. 

Excuse me while I go puke little chocolate hearts. (Shout out to my former college roommate Jolie who used to always use this phrase around this time of year.)

While I’m not one to celebrate or enjoy this holiday at all, there is one love that I’m very excited to share with you all today in my post. 

And that, my friends, is the love of myself and being single. 

This is something that I’ve often struggled with on the daily and even at age 31, it is still something that doesn’t come easy.

Why is this still a struggle for me? 

Let’s take a little trip down memory lane…

Growing up through the years in elementary school, middle school, and even high school I was the one who was poked fun at for being skinny. The one who was looked at as being different because I acted more feminine and enjoyed hanging out with girls more often than not. I was the one who enjoyed theater and music. I was the one who wanted to watch Wheel of Fortune or classic TV shows like I Love Lucy instead of sports or thriller movies that were considered to be “masculine.” 

I went through the days, weeks, and months of the school year learning to ignore the remarks from those that decided to pick on me, but I still have flashbacks every now and then of those moments that bring up extreme feelings of insecurity. 

When I came out of the closet in 11th grade, it was a huge moment for me in life that was greeted with joy and relief and released an energy of excitement and self-discovery inside my soul. To some people, it was a moment that was supported and loved whole-heartedly while for others, it was just another aspect of life that made it an easy target for being made fun of. 

I’ve been through the bullying. I’ve been through the name calling. I’ve been through the stares that people give because of being considered or viewed as “different.” 

These are the moments from my life that have helped me to become intentional about embracing my single status and learning to love myself.

For me, one of the greatest joys with being single is having the power to involve myself in things that make me feel fulfilled and happy on the inside. Whether it is working with customers to help their businesses grow bigger and better, helping fellow colleagues to improve their personal growth, running miles to raise funds for pediatric cancer, or working with 60 plus kids on the production of a classic Disney tale, my heart seems to constantly be overflowing with love and compassion to fuel my drive to push forward with the greatest of energy.

These days, more than ever, society tells us (or at least influences us) that we must have a partner by our side in order to be happy. It feels like a social stigma that is pushed on us from all different angles as we live out our daily lives. Whether it is that latest story line arc happening on TV’s most popular show, the plot from the hit movie currently playing at the movie theaters, or the damn advertisements for the next great romantic comedy on The Hallmark Channel, it just seems to be around every corner…something that we can’t escape from no matter how hard we try.

Currently, in my life I I don’t feel it necessary to have someone by my side to make myself feel “whole” or “complete.” I am my own person who gets to have control over my entire life–from setting the wake-up time on the alarm for those early mornings to determining my own bed time every single night. It’s glorious. And what’s even better is that I don’t have anyone around to judge me on those nights when I want to eat raw cookie dough from the container…that’s right…I do that. And I embrace it 150%.

Here are a few other things that I embrace 150% about myself…

1. I don’t like sleeping in sheets, so I will wrap myself in a blanket on top of my bed.

2. I enjoy sleeping on the couch more than anything.

3. I could watch the same episodes of The Golden Girls for the rest of my life and be incredibly content. 

4. I can listen to Katy Perry’s “Firework” on repeat for days and not get sick of it. 

5. I like to eat ice cream from the container, especially when I’m stressed. 

6. My love language is words of affirmation.

7. Social media is something that makes me jealous and blurs my judgment on the daily. 

8. I still struggle accepting compliments from others. 

9. I find washing dishes very therapeutic. 

10. My least favorite exercise at the gym is pushing the sled. 

11. My least favorite aisle to go down in the grocery store is the cereal aisle because there are too many choices. 

What are some aspects of my life thay help me embrace my self-love and single status?

1. I volunteer at EPAC doing a multitude of theater work including stage managing, acting, and music directing.

2. I decompress for at least 30 minutes each night whether it be watching The Golden Girls, reading, or coloring.

3. I work out with a personal trainer twice a week.

4. I involve myself in a cause that is close to my heart to share joy with others.

5. I embrace the principles of love and kindness and always look for way to display them.

Now, hit on the brakes and let’s take a quick U-turn! Hang on to your seat belts!

Are there moments in my life when I want to throw my phone at the wall and scream my head off because I see sappy photos of love birds all googly-eyed about their love for each other and perfect life with the hashtag of #blessed? 

Yes, absolutely. 

Will I be experiencing some of these moments this week on Thursday, February 14th?

Probably. 

Do I wish that Shawn Mendes would serenade me to sleep every night?!

DUH. Is that even a question? 

I don’t have the latest fashions. I don’t have the latest Iphone. I don’t have the biggest bank accounts. I don’t have the largest home. I don’t have the boyfriend to hug and say it’s going to be all better when I’ve had a crappy day.

And I’m OK with that. 

I came across the following quote a few weeks ago that has stuck with me ever since: 

“Single is not a status, it is a word that describes a person who is strong enough to live and enjoy life without depending on others.”

Amen. 

Embrace it. 

Love yourself.

The end. 

Sprinkle sunshine always,

JP!

Happy new week everyone!

I hope you all survived the bitter, brutal cold weather that Mother Nature decided to send our way and I hope that you are ready for the spring-like temperatures that we will be greeted with this coming week. Mother Nature is bi-polar and I for one am not able to handle it! 

Last week, I shared some of my favorite hot spots in Lancaster to explore during my “free time. Hopefully, we will get the chance to run into each other at one of these locations in the near future! 

As many of you already know (whether you are friends with me or just follow my blog), I am someone who fills my planner with lots of activities. And I mean LOTS. Like, we are talking jam packed full. If you were to open my planner, you might pass out because it is THAT full. Don’t believe me? Well then, just continue reading on and you will see Exhibit A for official photo evidence. 

Exhibit A:

One of these many activities filling up my planner is that of Mary Poppins Jr. at the Ephrata Performing Arts Center. Today concluded the third show of opening weekend, which has been a huge success. 

So, how have these kids captured my heart? Well, grab your popcorn and caffeinated beverage because here we go! 

Four years ago, I was asked if I would be interested in music directing the Kids4Kids production. Not trusting that I would be able to handle the task with teaching music for an entire production, I was a bit reluctant to say yes. However, through the positive encouragement and words from several parents, I decided to give it a shot. 

Words don’t even begin to express how thankful and grateful I am for saying that simple three letter word of “yes” four years ago. 

Auditions for Mary Poppins Jr. took place in October over a period of several days. After seeing almost 200 kids, it was quite overwhelming and exhausting to think about working with the other members of the production team to narrow down the cast to approximately 60 individuals. What a daunting task! 

But it happened. After many hours of discussion, it happened. A cast of 60+ kids of all ages (5-16) ready to take the stage in telling the classic tale of American’s favorite nanny. 

We started music rehearsals back in November—yes, that’s right. November. The score for this production is much like that of an adult production—there are SO many songs and SO much music…it’s mind boggling! Yet, these kids didn’t complain at all during the rehearsal process and learned each song with precision and grace.

Since the very first day of rehearsal when we sang Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, my heart melted. These kids had captured me through their genuine innocence, smiles, love, and incredible voices! It is quite possibly the best feeling that a 31 year-old music director can feel. 

Scratch that. IT IS the best feeling that a 31 year-old music director can feel. 

Through countless hours of rehearsals, choreography adjustments, set moves that are a beast, quick costume changes, and snow weather cancellations, we were all feeling on edge the week before opening. Blood, sweat, and tears went into this production…literally. This production is not simple. In fact, it could be considered a main stage show because of how HUGE it is. And you know what?!

These kids are crushing it. CRUSHING.

And Friday night, at 7:30pm, the lights went up and these kids gave the performance of their lives for the audience members that attended to fill the seats of the theatre. It was truly magical…right up to the very last moment when Mary flew across the stage with her famous foot position. 

I’ve had the opportunity to be backstage learning the reigns of stage manager duties which I will be handling this week and I can’t tell you how much of a joy it is to see these kids sing, dance, and smile. I’m not going to lie, I sing along backstage because it is impossible not to with these songs. And these kids just bring you into the story with their energy that you just have to sing with them.

I look around at the world we wake up to each day and see darkness, hate, negativity, and violence. It is upsetting.

I look around at these kids and see passion, love, kindness,innocence, hopefulness, and a bright future. They are the ones who can encourage and embrace positive change.

Mary Poppins Jr. is the kind of show that this world needs right now. It is full of heartfelt moments, laughs, catchy tunes, bright costumes, beautiful sets, and moments of joy around every corner and rooftop. 

These kids have tugged on my heartstrings to make me beam from ear to ear and tear upwith their performances. And we have still have two more weeks of shows. I don’t even want to know how much of a mess I will be on closing day, but we won’t go there…yet.

I’m one heck of a proud music director for sure. 

I’ve been working with the Kids4Kids productions for the past four years and I can say without a doubt that this show is easily my favorite. And this cast–talented, kind, hard-working, passionate, and fun loving.

Don’t miss out on the magic. Don’t miss out on having your heart captured by the smiles and passion of these 60+ young performers. 

A spoonful of sugar might be just what you need to forget about the dreariness of the world for a short second. 

As Mary Poppins says, “anything can happen if you let it.” So let yourself go from the stress of life and let these kids take you on a journey through London unlike one you’ve ever experienced before.

Sprinkle sunshine always,

JP!

Happy new week everyone! 

It’s hard to believe that we are coming to the end of our first month in 2019. BUT LIKE seriously though…where does the time go? I swear it goes by faster each and every year. 

Before I move on to this week’s post, I just want to extend a huge, heartfelt “thank you” to everyone for the support and love from last week’s post. It was truly humbling to get so many messages from people and just seeing the love shared in facets all over social media. It ended up being my most viewed blog post to date, which is awesome. Words can’t really describe how thankful I am for all of you who come back week after week to join in the antics of Mr. Sunshine. 

Anyhoo, on to this week’s post! Quick shout out to my friend AND “porch buddy for life (PB4L),” Rainer for the topic idea! 

I’ve lived in the incredibly cool city of Lancaster for just over two years now. And for those who follow my life and know me, realize that I’m always on the go…and I mean ALWAYS. Therefore, if you ever run into me out and about in the city, it is a rare occurrence…which means you should either circle the date on your calendar or try your luck at playing the lottery. 

So…what are my favorite “hot spots” to experience in the city when I’m out and about for those rare occurrence evenings? Well, read on to find about my faves! 

1.    The Fulton Theatre

-I know. I know. Shocker! It’s ok…you can tell me your jaw dropped to the floor. I’ll wait. This one is like a given to anyone who knows me. I’m a sap when it comes to theater and the arts, so naturally, this is one of my favorite spots to spend an evening. Dazzling costumes, talented individuals, electrifying choreography, and luscious sets and sound make for an enchanting evening worth every penny. There are so many shows that I want to see this season, so if you are someone who appreciates the arts, hit me up and maybe we can plan a night of supporting live theatre. And what is the show that I’m most excited for this season?! Hands down without a doubt it is Mamma Mia! 

2.    Pottery Works 

-The place where the creative brain can be unleashed! A wonderful way to decompress from the stressors of life whilst in the company of friends and possibly even some adult cocktails too! There are so many choices of pottery to choose from that it can be a bit overwhelming at first; however, once those artistic juices are flowing it’s no stopping! Seriously…so much fun! Now if I could just get the same motivation and energy that I have when painting pottery to paint my actual house…

3.    The Pressroom 

-Whether it is a team dinner with my co-workers or date night with good friends before a night at the theatre, this place has got it all! Fabulous cocktails, wonderful service, cute waiters and bartenders (yeah, I said it…get over it), delicious food, and a fun, laid-back atmosphere. I can say that in all the times that I’ve populated this place, I’ve never had a drink or meal that I didn’t enjoy. My favorite menu item and cocktail combination is the grilled marinated chicken and Moscow Mule. The perfect pair…well…it is for for me and my tummy. And…you know what’s even better?! The fact that you can enjoy this place year-round with their outdoor Park Bar too! It is a casual, simple outdoor area to enjoy fun and companionship with good friends along with the deliciousness known as FROSE! Literally…SO GOOD. 

4.    The Belvedere Inn 

-This is one that should also come as no surprise to anyone who knows me. There are so many wonderful things about this place almost too numerous to mention. Cocktail beverages to die for, food that is so incredibly tasty, spectacular staff, great atmosphere, a grand piano, and a hallway of mirrors…which can still freak me out to this day. My current obsession is the Hammond Pretzel Crusted Pork Cutlet. It is to die for. As far as cocktails, I can’t really say what my favorite is because I usually end up just asking for “something fruity” from the bartender whenever I end up here. This place is also within walking distance for me (or running distance…yes, I ran home one night, but that’s a story for another time). 

One of my favorite things about the city is that I can walk almost anywhere. I can step out of the bright blue door of my casa and take my legs in any direction to find something unique, inspiring, and fun! 

And what’s one more perk about the city? I get to live only a few houses down from my best friend, which is pretty cool. How many people in life can say that?! But like…that’s pretty awesome if you ask me! Be jealous.

There you have it! Some of my Lancaster favorites! I know it isn’t a huge list; however, in the world of someone with three jobs, trying to run 1000 miles, and participating in shows at the EPAC, there isn’t always time to check out all the cool places the city has to offer.

Well, friends. The clock is about to strike 11pm, which means I’m turning into a pumpkin, so it’s time to bring this blog to a close. 

Until the next time we meet…and who knows, maybe it will be at one of these great places in Lancaster City?! You just never know, so be on the lookout. Mr. Sunshine could be right around the corner!

Sprinkle sunshine always,

JP!  

I don’t know how many of you have had this experience or feeling before; however, it is extremely hard for me to pull up CNN on the computer without getting frustrated or saddened by the headlines that are flashing in front of me on the screen as I try to live out my daily life. It is discouraging. It is overwhelming. And it saddens my heart…greatly. We’ve been bombarded with stories about the government shutdown, terror atracks in multiple facets, stock market woes, retail store shutdowns, violence around every corner…it just never ends.

Last year, we were hit hard with the news of multiple suicides in the Nation. Some of those that stick out to me were Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain. Because of those stories and knowing that there are so many others of all ages struggling with feelings of suicide, I feel it is even more important to share love and support with those around us.

During my time at Penn State, I went through my share of feelings and struggles with wanting to hurt myself. I would be lying to you if I said I didn’t still have those moments. However, the immense love and support of family and friends is what helped me survive.

Currently, I’ve been struggling personally with recent information about the “church down the street” from my home congregation in Penryn that seems to have an issue with our views on faith and my sexuality. Last time I checked, God is about love and love is love is love regardless of whether it is for a man or woman.

I walk into church every Sunday with an energy of love and passion. I have a blast playing the music for the congregation and it gives my soul such joy to see everyone come together during the time of worship and fellowship we share for that hour on Sunday mornings. I have had so many raw, emotional moments on both the organ and piano bench during Sunday services that help me explore deep thoughts inside myself to grow even more as an individual. I can tell you right now that my sexuality is not something that bothers any of the people in the pews of the congregation. The support and love I have from that church is immense beyond belief. And I’m grateful and blessed.

In spring of 2005, my junior year of high school, I made the decision to come out to a few of my friends. And while it was a decision that weighed heavily on me day in and day out, it is one that I look back on with no regrets. 14 years later, I write to you as an individual who has been bullied, called inappropriate names, stared at constantly, and judged daily. How can it be that we still live in a world that feeds off hate, negativity, and judgment? That is the million dollar question. Why is that we act with guns and violence rather than love and kindness? Why is it that we choose to shut out others rather than listen with patience and understanding? Why do we refuse to find common ground and solutions? Do you have the answer?

I am a believer in sharing love and kindness to everyone regardless of social status, ethnicity, religion, or sexual orientation. I look for the good in others and work hard in finding ways to make those around me happier. I believe in happily ever after and will not sacrifice my morals or values to find whatever that might be for me in life. I fight for what I believe in. I am happy. I am positive. I am spiritual. I am joyful. I am silly. I am reactive. I am emotional. I am proud. I am colorful. I am Mr. Sunshine. I am JP. I am gay.

One day, I hope that we will be able to live in a world free of the judgment walls of hate that we have built up. I hope that people will realize that I, along with my fellow LGTB community, are human beings full of love to give with open arms. All human hands, regardless of color, have the right to love and be loved by whomever.

The world that we live in is made up of many colors. It is up to each and every of you to look inside your heart and share one love with all.

More love. Less hate. Amen.

The word musical is defined as “a play or movie in which singing and dancing play an essential part.” The thrill of incredible voices belting songs that fill the theatre walls with lush sound, the electrifying choreography that grabs our attention with fancy footwork, the colorful costumes, detailed sets, special effects, and storyline plots that tug at our heartstrings and give us warm fuzzies. It’s all part of the magic that falls under the definition of a musical. But what makes up a GREAT musical?  

 I can’t tell you how many times I entered the question of “what are the elements that make up a great musical” in Google search and even with re-wording the question for what felt to me like a million different times, none of the answers that came up jumped out at me. So naturally, I decided to come up with my own persona list. So buckle up because here we go!

 Element Number 1: A storyline. Just like every book, a great musical needs to have a storyline that grabs your attention from the start of act 1, leaves you on your seat for the start of intermission, then comes full circle throughout the remainder of act 2 right up until the final note of the finale. The storyline is one that should touch all of your emotions and makes you a part of the story from every crack of laughter to stream of tears. I’ve seen several musicals throughout the years, but I can honestly say without a doubt that The Lion King was one of those musicals for me. From the very first note that the orchestra hit in Circle of Life, to the dramatic death of Mufassa…all the way through the very end where peace is restored at Pride Rock, I was captivated. 

If we step back for a moment and look at our own lives, wouldn’t you say that we too are creating a storyline for ourselves? Since the day of our birth when we were brought into this world, we have been crafting our own stories; constantly evolving and changing based on the world that is around us. We are dealt cards in our lives on a daily basis that put us on the edge of our seat, force us to make choices, and dance our way through the twists and turns of an ever-thickening plot. 

Some of those cards we are dealt might cut our storyline short or bring about very intense emotions of happiness or sadness, but it is all in how we respond…how we write our storyline. 

If I were to deal you the card of getting a pink slip at work, would you automatically give up and accept defeat, or stand up on you own two feet and get out there to look for another job?

Or, on the contrary, if I were to deal you the card of a family member passing, would you choose to celebrate their life in memory with smiles or fall into a depression of sadness and despair?

 How are you evolving your storyline—today, tomorrow, in this very present moment? In a world that is constantly throwing us negative energy and hatred our way, are you one that responds with love and kindness or do you get overwhelmed, angry, and shut down? 

Awhile back on social media, I remember stumbling across a post and picture that has been ingrained in my mind ever since I saw it. It was a photograph taken of a 4 year old girl in her final days while suffering from a battle with cancer. The picture was snapped by Andy Whelan, a British photographer. In the picture, tears are streaming down the young girls’ face, she has IVs in her arms, and the emotion, pain, and rawness snapped in the photo is unreal. The father who shared this picture that went viral with the world writes, “Please, I beg of you, as a heartbroken father, it is too late for my daughter, but childhood cancer needs to be cured. No family should have to go through this hell.” 

Two weeks ago, I launched a year-long campaign of running 1000 miles to raise awareness and funds of 10,000 for pediatric cancer research in hopes of helping families who have been dealt the card of childhood cancer fight their battle with a gleam of hope. 

Right now…in this very moment…how will you continue to live on in life and handle the cards that have been dealt to you? How will you navigate and respond to the personal plot twists to evolve your storyline before the curtain falls? 

Element number 2: a great cast. For those of you who have seen a musical, you know that having a great cast is essential. You need people with energy, great voices, lots of talent, coordination…basically people who are amazing at everything. Typically, when you are watching a show from the audience, there always seems to be those few people that stand out from all others in the cast…those with the energy on their faces that just draw you in from the moment they hit the stage. A great cast is one that loves each other through thick and thin, puts aside their differences to come together, and has fun entertaining the masses. 

 So, once again, let’s step back and examine this element in our lives. We too, in our ever evolving storyline, have a cast of great people beside us: our friends and family. They are the glue that holds us together, the ones we love the most, the people we create memories with that we will always hold dear, and at the end of the day, the ones that stick by our side even when the music stops and our storyline has drawn to an end. 

In the series finale of The Golden Girls that aired back in May of 1992, the final 3 minutes of the episode involve all four women (Rose, Blanche, Sophia, and Dorothy) hugging and trying to find the right words about their time together for the past 7 years. Bea Arthur, who plays Dorothy, begins to cry saying “It’s been an experience that I will always keep close to my heart and that these are memories that I’ll wrap myself in when the world gets cold and I forget that there are people who are warm and loving.” It then ends with them embracing in a big hug, and of course, lots of tears. For those who care to watch, it is below!

https://youtu.be/Q2Erl1wJQFI

Who are the most valuable cast mates in your life that will help you remember that love and kindness do in fact exist when the world around you is cold and dreary? 

 

Element Number 3: An intelligent director. In the world of musicals a good creative team is crucial, but none more important than the director. They are the ones that give direction to the cast, share their artistic thoughts of how scenes should play out, and ultimately can make last minute changes as they please. It can be a stressful job, but it is up to the cast to take the advice of the director and run with it to make it part of a beautiful production. 

We are our own director in this life. It is up to us to utilize the blessings we’ve been given and the love in our hearts to go out and share them with the world. What gifts in your life are you being directed to use to evolve your own storyline and make a difference in this world?

As Anne Frank once said, “How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” 

 

Element #4: A good moral/catchphrase. We are constantly blasted with these on the daily, but isn’t it easier to remember something when it has a catchy phrase or moral to go along with it? In the world of TV through the form of advertisements, commercials, and jingles we are reminded constantly “to never leave home without it” (American Express), “15 minutes can save you 15% or more on your car insurance” (Geico), or my personal favorite, “America Runs On Dunkin.” Shifting gears to the world of musicals with both slogans and morals, The Wizard of Oz is one that pops immediately into my head. Dorothy and her travels across the yellow brick road through Munchkinland and Emerald City with the Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Cowardly Lion ultimately remind us in the end that “There is no place like home.” In addition, The Sound of Music tells us to “climb every mountain”—a powerful mantra that reminds us to stay strong and continue moving forward even when we want to give up in those dark moments of life.

 Michael J. Fox revealed to the world in September of 1998 that he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease. He was famous for many TV and movie roles including Alex Keaton on the 80’s sitcom Family Ties and Marty McFly in the movie, Back to the Future. In his memoir published back in 2002, Fox writes these words to readers:

 “If you were to rush into this room right now and announce that you had struck a deal with God, Allah, Buddha, Christ, Bill Gates, whomever—in which the ten years since my diagnosis could be magically taken away, traded in for ten more years as the person I was before, I would, without a moment’s hesitation, tell you to take a hike. These ten years since my diagnosis have been the best ten years of my life, and I consider myself a lucky man.” 

To me, Fox’s life slogan is that he is a “lucky man” not taking any moment for granted and someone who continues to live each and every day to the fullest without any regrets. 

What is the catch phrase and moral that you want people to remember you by? What is the personal slogan that will tie in to the storyline you are currently writing? Can YOU create positive change in the world? 

In my daily life, there are two famous quotes that I try to embrace each and every day—one from a famous children’s book author, and the other a classic film and fashion icon.

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” 

This of course comes from the infamous Dr. Seuss and to me is a slogan that we all should be living out 100% day in and day out. It is one moral and life slogan that to me will never lose relevance, even 50 years from now. 

“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says I’m possible!”

Audrey Hepburn is the one known for coining this phrase and what a great quote it is.

 With Miss Hepburn’s wise words, I feel that I can take liberty to add just two sentences to make the quote have even more relevance to present day. 

 “Nothing is impossible; the word itself says I’m possible. You are possible. And together, this world is possible.”  

 In the world of musicals, there are no second chances. Anything can happen and a cast must learn to roll with the punches no matter what. The director can give insight; however, it is ultimately up to the cast for bringing the storyline to life, keeping it fresh, and driving home the catchphrase and moral for the audience to take with them as they leave the theatre. 

We are given only once chance in this life. As you go about your life today, tomorrow, and the days after, how will you evolve the musical of your life? What changes and choices will you make to both your personal storyline and cast? 

Our world can be an awful place, but each morning when we wake up, we have a choice. We can be part of the solution or part of the problem. What way will you choose and how will you decide to live out today, tomorrow, and every day after of your own life musical before the curtain falls?

Sprinkle sunshine always,

JP!

Well, hello there readers! And happy official 2019! I trust and hope that you all had a wonderful time ringing in the New Year with family and friends and watching the ball drop…or falling asleep before the strike of midnight…and seriously, there’s no judgment from this corner if you did! 

It’s hard to believe that we are already one full week into the new year…and it will only continue to go faster and faster with each passing hour, day, week, month! It will be Christmas 2019 before we know it…but I digress. But seriously, I’ve already started planning ideas in my head for Christmas Eve 2019 at church…but that’s our little secret! So, shhhh!

Well, goodness gracious me. I’m already into the third paragraph and I haven’t even really begun to start my official blog post topic. I get side tracked easily…per the usual. SQUIRREL.

Anyhoo…this week’s post will answer the million dollar question of…

DRUM ROLL PLEASE…

 What is joy? 

A loaded question for many people in this world, including Mr. Sunshine. 

This is a question that I’ve often searched the answer for in my life over the years, and I must say, this year, in 2019, I think I’ve finally discovered that answer. But first, let us review the official Webster dictionary definition…shall we?

So grab your cup of tea, blanket, and have a sit in the headmaster’s chair of the library because this is…Masterpiece Theater…kidding! But that is totally the scene that I see playing in my head as I write this…official sitting down in a chair with reading glasses over the eyes, dictionary in hand, and reading the definition to the camera as the fire crackles in the background of the library habitat. Yes? Anyone?

Once again, I’ve digressed…moving on…the official definition of joy is: 

 1.    The emotion of great delight or happiness caused by something exceptionally good or satisfying; keen pleasure; elation.

2.    A source or cause of keen pleasure or delight; something or someone greatly valued or appreciated: Her prose style is a pure joy. 

3.    The expression or display of glad feeling; festive gaiety. 

This week, I was reading The Book of Joy by the 14th Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu. (Total side note (are you surprised)…while I haven’t finished the book, I’m super close to finishing and it is an excellent read. HIGHLY recommended.

Anyway, while I was reading, I came across the below excerpt which really spoke to me. I feel it is the essence of what joy is for me personally and what I’ve worked to try and discover over the years.

“The Archbishop and the Dalai Lama had revealed throughout the week one of the core paradoxes of happiness. We are most joyful when we focus on others, not on ourselves. In short, bringing joy to others is the fastest way to experience joy oneself. As the Dalai Lama had said, even ten minutes of meditation on the well-being of others can help one to feel joyful for the whole day—even before coffee. When we close our heart, we cannot be joyful. When we have the courage to live with an open heart, we are able to feel our pain and the pain of others, but we are also able to experience more joy. The bigger and warmer our heart, the stronger our sense of aliveness and resilience.” 

How true are these words. They are still resonating in my mind.

For those of you who haven’t seen or heard already, I launched a year-long campaign on January 2nd that is going to shape my 2019 both emotionally and physically, but also fulfill my soul and heart with the greatest feeling of joy. It is entitled “1K For 10K” and involves me running 1000 (or more) miles over the course of the year while working to raise both awareness and funds totaling $10,000 for pediatric cancer research. This has been a dream of mine for the past year and to see it finally become a reality is truly humbling. You can learn more about my mission, follow my progress, share encouragement, and make a donation by checking out the official website, https://1kfor10k.com/.

For me, JOY IS NOT…

…Spending money on the latest and greatest luxuries. 

…Having the most money in the bank accounts. 

…Getting the most likes on different outlets of social media. 

…Being the most popular or having the most friends. 

For me, JOY IS…

…Lifting up others with love, kindness, and support even those who are strangers.

…Figuring out how to help others in need while encouraging positive change. 

…Making sure that all around me are treated with respect and kindness regardless of their social status, religion, ethnicity, or sexual orientation. 

…Spending quality time with friends and family who love you, support you through thick and thin, laugh with you, cry with you, and challenge you to be the best you can be.

There you have it.

I’ve answered the million dollar question, so now it’s your turn. 

How will you bring your definition of joy to life in 2019? 

Sprinkle sunshine always,

JP!

The chestnuts have been roasted on an open fire, our dreams have been filled with sugar plum fairies, our stomachs have been filled with the tastiest of treats, and we’ve heard the last official play of Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas Is You” until August of 2019.

And now…we have only a few, short days to eat and finish all the junk food and cookies we’ve been given as gifts before 2019 kicks off.

Are you someone who gets caught up in setting resolutions for yourself every year? 

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always set resolutions and goals for myself because it helps me to stay on track throughout the year with my well-being and personal growth. 

This week, I wanted to share a few of my personal 2019 resolutions with you as I prepare for what will be a challenging, exciting year for me personally. In addition to these goals and resolutions, I have also picked two words that I will try to emulate in order to shape my 2019. 

But, before I share those resolutions, don’t forget that January 2 is only two days away, which means Sunshine Reveal #2 will be revealed in 48 hours! Yikes! 

Anyhoo, I tend to get a bit carried away with my resolutions, so you might look at my list at first and think “Good lord, child you cray” and that’s OK with me.

Let us begin…because visions of sugar plum fairies keep dancing in my head and getting me distracted. 

1.       Complete 3 house projects. 

-I’ve never viewed myself as the type of person who buys a house to remodel everything…and I mean everything. I’m just thankful to have a roof over my head. However, this year is going to be one where I start to look at making some improvements and since I’m not a very handy DIY person, I could use suggestions. Shoot them my way. Please and thank you! 

2.       Eat better and do more meal prepping. 

-I feel like this is one that I always have on my list each year. I always start out good for like the first month and then I fall off the bandwagon into the dust. This year, I plan to use my brand spanking new crockpot from Christmas (thanks Mom and Dad) to do some meal prepping. In addition, I would like to try and limit my caffeine intake (yes, I said it) and sugar rush since I love both of those things going into my body. Constantly. Like an IV.

3.       Set aside 1 night a week for just “me time.” 

-This is one that people have often asked me about because of the crazy schedule and fast-paced environment and life I live. Currently, my “me time” usually consists of watching “The Golden Girls” each night; however, this year, the “me time” is going to look a bit different with some added additions of coloring, journaling, and reading. I can’t wait!

4.       Read at least 10 books. 

-Reading has never been a strong suit for me just because I feel like a slow reader. I already have several books on my end table that I’m excited to read and if you have any suggestions, feel free to slide them my way! 

5.       Payoff one of my student loans. 

-It’s everyone’s favorite! NOT. Currently, I have two that I’m still working to pay off, so by the end of this year, only one will remain. College graduation was 8 years ago, so getting down to one student loan will be a true blessing. I see one happy kid in my future.

6. Go through the entire house and organize and minimalize everything.

-The joy of less. I plan to go through each room of the house and this year, will get rid of crap! I find joy in simple things and quite often clutter of the house gets me overwhelmed, so it’s time to take charge! Tackling this will be challenging; however, my success will come by dividing and conquering. Each part of the house will be divided into “sectors” and by December 2019, all “sectors” will be free from crap and clutter. GET READY.

My Two Words For 2019 Are: 

Grateful: adjective; feeling or showing an appreciation of kindness, thankful. 

Tranquility: noun; the quality or state of being tranquil, calm

I chose these two words because they are qualities that I really want to display as I live out my life in the new year. I’m often someone who can be high strung, especially when I’m living in a fast-paced environment so I want to work on trying to be calmer and focusing on peacefulness and the art of being tranquil. In addition, I want to continue showing gratefulness for all the blessings in my life and realizing that nothing should be taken for granted. 

Well, there you have it. The goals, resolutions, and words for Mr. Sunshine’s 2019. And what a year it will be.

What are your goals and resolutions for the new year? 

Wishing all of you a joyous new year and continued well wishes as you work toward personal growth in 2019. Thank you all for following along with my blog thus far and coming back each week for more! It is greatly appreciate and my heart is happy.

Looking forward to continuing my blogs with you and my Sunshine Reveal in 2 days! 

Sprinkle sunshine always,

JP!

 

Last week, I shared with you all how anxiety is real…even in the life of Mr. Sunshine.

This week, as I lay here wrapped in my blanket on the couch with The Golden Girls playing in the background, I can’t help but continue to visualize in my mind all the things that must be accomplished in the next week for the Christmas holiday.

For those of you who don’t know, the holiday season can be a very trying time for a church music director, especially one who has OCD and perfectionism habits times a thousand million zillion, is trying to complete last minute details for a January 2 reveal to the public, working a full and part time job, and involves himself in a local production of a Disney classic that runs for three weeks right up until three days before the big holiday.

And if planning and finalizing a Christmas Eve service isn’t enough, I’ve got gifts to wrap (and by wrap I mean put tissue paper around items and place in bags), cards to write, and final gift shopping to complete.

What does this all mean? It means that visions of sugar plum fairies won’t be dancing in my head. It means that I will be the one eating the cookies and milk…not the jolly guy in the red suit. It means that I will be enjoying all…and I mean ALL the coffee in this final week of preparation.

So, how will I tackle all these millions of things in the coming week for the Christmas season while keeping up the holiday cheer?

Well, let’s begin! (And keep in mind this list is applicable to holidays and basically 365 days a year, 7 days a week, 24 hours a day).

So grab your tub of cookie dough, fuzzy socks, and mug of hot cocoa because here come my Christmas crunch time secrets.

1. Make a list of everything that needs completed.

-As the Sound of Music reminds us, “let’s start at the very beginning, a very good place to start.” Start simple. Make a list (or lists) of everything that needs completed. This way, you can visualize what needs tackled and completed all in one place.

2. Delegate.

-This is the one that has always been a struggle for me. From your list, take portions of it and delegate the tasks. Utilize the talents of those around you and make smart choices. For example, if someone is creative, give them the tasks that require a visual eye. Or, if you stink at gift wrapping (like I do), engage someone who you know loves doing it in exchange for a lunch date or coffee. My good friend, Elyse is one that can attest to this very bullet point! If you maximize the talents of those around you, success will be yours. Divide and conquer as they say!

3. Tackle little by little.

-This is one that I also struggle with. So often, I want to do everything at once and get it all done in one sitting, which is virtually impossible. Make specific goals of completion from your lists of tasks. Prioritize those that are most important. For example, the gifts and cards for people that I will see on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day will get wrapped last. Slow and steady wins the race and this is an aspect that I must get better with…practice what you preach as they say…still working on that.

4. Take mental breaks when needed.

-Give yourself a break when needed. Listen to your body. If your hand is cramping from writing too many personal notes in Christmas cards…well then take a break! Grab a swig or coffee or that spoonful in cookie dough you’ve dreaming about. If your eyes are drooping shut as you type out blog posts on the laptop, turn into bed earlier than normal and give the body that rest it’s been wanting for the last 4 month.

5. Remember to enjoy the company of those in your life you love most.

-This one comes without saying. The holiday is ultimately a time to be with the family and friends that you love most, so make sure you take time to relish in those moments, especially the ones of traditions that hold a special place in your heart. We won’t have these moments forever, so enjoy them while you can.

Well, there you have it. The Christmas crunch time secrets of Mr. Sunshine. And while some of these bullet points from the list are aspects I’m not the best at, I’m trying. Lord knows I’m not perfect…and I embrace that imperfection.

As we move forward to this final week of preparation before the big holiday, let us all remember to take moments of reflection to soak up every ounce of cheer possible.

It’s Christmas crunch time.

Are you ready?

Sprinkle sunshine always,

JP!

The peeling paint on the walls of the house, the dust collecting on the hardwood floor, the pile of Christmas gifts in my room the need wrapping, the pile of Christmas cards on the coffee table in the living room, the last minute details of planning a Christmas Eve service that will be inspirational and moving to all who attend, the latest gay couple engagement photo from social media. What do all these things all have in common?

They are just a few of the current thoughts running through my mind that are giving me…wait for it…anxiety.

ANXIETY.

Yes, you read it right. Anxiety. Even Mr. Sunshine experiences it.

According to the ADAA (Anxiety and Depression Association of America), here are a few quick facts and statistics:

• Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older, or 18.1% of the population every year.
• Anxiety disorders are highly treatable, yet only 36.9% of those suffering receive treatment.
• People with an anxiety disorder are three to five times more likely to go to the doctor and six times more likely to be hospitalized for psychiatric disorders than those who do not suffer from anxiety disorders.
• Anxiety disorders develop from a complex set of risk factors, including genetics, brain chemistry, personality, and life events.

I’m not one who has ever officially diagnosed myself as “depressed” (or sought professional medical attention); however, I will admit with full heart on my sleeve that feelings of “anxiousness” and the term of “anxiety” are ones that have moved their way into my vocabulary more often than not these days. I don’t know if it is because my brain has matured with getting older in the adult life, but it is a real struggle for me personally that I don’t always feel comfortable admitting to others.

I think, in my mind, the greatest fear for me admitting that I have these anxious feelings is that it will make me look like a failure–someone who is weak.

While I know the above is not true since it is just a story I create in my head, it is how I’m wired in the brain naturally with my personality. Combating the fears of looking like a failure or not good enough to others is one of the hardest things for me.

It takes a lot of positivity, energy, and optimism to keep up a personality of happiness . And quite frankly…there are times when I don’t have that. At all.

And the anxiety grows.

Right now in life is one of those times. The time after Thanksgiving leading up to Christmas is always jammed pack and sometimes, it is easy for me to forget to breath, eat, and sleep. There is a constant list of things that need completed and my OCD makes it simple to panic and become stressed out.

Now, let’s go back to one of the entities above that is currently on my list of aspects in life that give me the anxious feelings.

Gay couple photos on Instagram.

Being single is something that I find myself feeling very comfortable with for the most part these days. But sometimes, when I log on to social media and see the smiles of the gays in full force with their significant other, I can’t help but get a combination of feelings which include both jealousy and fear. Jealousy in the fact that I don’t have what I’m seeing portrayed through the pictures I witness with my eyes and fear that I will just shut down, which I’ve done previously. Just last week, I went through a moment of anxiety because I came home late from the theater and I wanted nothing more in the world than to be greeted by a significant other with the world’s biggest hug.

Now, I don’t want you to read this post and think to yourself “Gosh, that J.P. is not a happy person.” That, by far, is the furthest thing from the truth. Deep down, in my soul, I’m a very happy person who does so much on the daily to keep my heart fulfilled and feeling vibes of warmth and joy. It’s just that sometimes I hit road blocks. Road blocks which are called anxiety.

My time at the theater is often very special to me because it involves relationships and friendships with some very special people and allows me to transport myself to a world of fantasy where I can play a specific character(s) under the excitement of lights to bring smiles to the face of audience members. It is one reason why I always keep going back for more. I can’t stay away. And it helps me combat the road blocks of anxiety that find their way on to my path of daily life.

January 2nd will release a whole new world of Mr. Sunshine to the community around me when I take on something of extreme magnitude that I’ve never done before. It will be a challenge for sure, but the true happiness and joy that it will bring to me (and hopefully others), will be immeasurable. Once this day hits, hopefully the word of anxiety will be one found in my past.

As the days continue on, I will continue to learn more about myself and how to cope with the ever-growing list of aspects in life that give anxiois feelings. I will continue to learn how to channel a negative energy into something positive. I will continue to come up with new ways on how to spread hope and love to others in the community.

Anxiety is real.

Even in the world of Mr. Sunshine, there are a few rumbles of thunder and clouds.

Sprinkle sunshine always,

JP!